Tag Archives: Choices

Seeds

So maybe you aren’t a gardener like me, but you are the master gardener (for lack of better words) of your own life. You choose the seeds to plant in your garden. You decide whether to water, fertilize or plant in a sunny area. However, in the end it is God that brings the harvest. He says “a man reaps what he sows.” Galatians 6:7

You want a new life? You want things to change? Then change it, by planting different seeds. Start making different choices and your life will begin to transform.

One good decision after another, results in a good life. One bad decision after another, makes for a bad life. I find it funny when I get a call from a Girl who’s life has fallen apart and she doesn’t understand what transpired. Hmm…let’s take a look at your life, “Oh, you’ve been getting drunk on a regular basis, you’re living with your boyfriend even though you both claim to be Christians, the two of you fight all the time, you’re miserable, insecure and wonder what happened?”

I’ll tell ya what happened. One bad choice after another landed you in this miserable situation you now find yourself in. Sorry, I know the truth hurts, but it also has the ability to set you free as well.

My life used to be an absolute mess too, but then I heard that God could change my life. I thought He would just say the word and my life would change, as if to wave the magic wand and presto, but that never happened. My life actually got worse. It took years before I finally realized that God wanted me to participate in the process of my life transformation. He wanted me to take responsibility for my own actions and start making healthy choices, by using His power to pull it off.

I realized that I had a ton of little opportunities all throughout the day, so I started making good choices and doing the right thing even though no one was watching. Being a “bad girl-gone good” was very difficult, but once I made a habit of making healthy choices, I began to see the desired results and the healthy habit became easier to maintain.

The Bible says “He that is faithful in the small will be faithful in much.” Luke 16:10

For the last year, I’ve been planting seeds with very little growth, so it seemed. I’ve worked so hard, diligently doing things that are outside of my gifting and experience as I’ve tried to get this ministry off the ground. Here’s me keeping it real…I was uncomfortable, anxious, and had bouts of disbelief while waiting for results and not seeing them right away. It made me question whether I had what it took to accomplish what I knew God had called me to do.

Those fears and insecurities came from not being able to see instant results. The results were coming, but I couldn’t see them. Besides do I really want results that happen quickly, only to die just as quick as they came or do I want results that last a lifetime? The latter of course. It has taken patience and trust on my part to not give up and keep going and I’m so glad I did, because it’s finally happening. What if I would have given up?

A few months ago things started to change…I started meeting like-minded women in my area with a heart for Jesus and doing His work. Then over the last few weeks things have really started to pick up. People are approaching me who want to help get this ball rolling, donations are beginning to come in and a couple of churches and other ministries have expressed a desire to partner with Purely His.

I say all of this to encourage those of you who have been working really hard with little to no results, planting seeds with no visible harvest to speak of. Please keep planting those good seeds, because they are taking root, deep roots that will be strong during the storms that are sure to come. Those plants will begin to shoot up before you know it and the harvest will be plentiful! You may even have to hire people to help you reap. I also challenge those of you who’s lives are in turmoil…start making different, healthier choices. You won’t regret it.

I understand that others choices affect our lives negatively too, but we can’t use them as an excuse. We are responsible for the way we choose to respond and what seeds we choose to plant.

God will not be mocked. Plant good seeds = good life. Plant bad seeds = bad life.

 

Sharon’s Story

IMAG0999-1This guest blog was written by Sharon Tucker-another one of Purely His Mentors.

On May 9, 2011 I just gave up. The consequences in my life had become too overwhelming. I was online looking for something to hold onto, some reason to keep going and I saw these words “It may be that your whole life was meant to be used as a warning to others.” Those dark forbidding words caught my eye and everything in me KNEW they were meant for me. I took hold of the container sitting next to me on the bed. My life had become the warning for every young woman who thought her choices were no one else’s business. Young women, just like the one I had been, dismiss warnings with these types of statements: “If I’m making a mistake, I’m willing to pay the consequence, so don’t you worry yourself about MY choices”. Oh, the arrogance of youth!

I had always been a pretty optimistic person, but the year prior to this day had been overwhelmingly dark and full of hopelessness and fear. I had to hold myself back at times from becoming the crazed person on the street corner shouting at people to repent and turn from their wicked ways , for surely they are destined for hell. I wanted to grab hold of people and scream at them “Do you have any idea what kind of hell you’re headed towards?!”

Please be warned! This is where YOU can be 20-some years later when your self-centeredness catches up with you. You too can be at your darkest moment, contemplating what I was contemplating. I had refilled my prescription that day. I refilled it even after my decision a week earlier to stop using it. I recognized it wasn’t for sleep any longer, it was for forgetfulness, the relief of nothingness. When I took the medicine I had no dreams, I wasn’t awakened in the night remembering what had happened and how I was responsible for so much of the trauma surrounding me. The nothingness was a wonderful reprieve I had come to rely on. That day, when I went back to the pharmacy and refilled my prescription, I knew it wasn’t for sleep. It was so I didn’t ever have to wake from that blessed reprieve again.

Over the prior year well-meaning friends kept telling me it wasn’t my fault. Over and over I heard them say the hurt caused to my youngest daughter by my ex-husband was his sin, his choice. But I knew the truth – I had my own part in the harm that’s come to my family and others. His choices AND my choices led us to this day.

It was my choice to have sex at 16 and become a mother at 17; my choice to blithely bring my precious first daughter into a life of chaotic relationship with her father and me; my choice to raise her without God in our lives (because I was doing just fine all on my own, thank you very much!).

After that marriage failed, it was my choice to then date a married man; my choice to move away from the area with him, leaving his wife and children without their husband and father; my choice to marry this man.

It was my choice to adopt another precious baby girl; my choice to become a mom with this man I already recognized as an alcoholic; my choice to raise her in an unstable marriage.

What choice did anyone else have in these decisions? Absolutely none. The only two who had any choice in the matter were the two of us. We left a swath of destruction in the wake of our selfishness.

We left a woman alone to take care of herself and the three children they had previously promised to raise together. We left that woman to face living the remainder of her life alone and eventually to face treatment for cancer without her husband by her side, a cancer that took her life. We left that – and so much more – in our wake.

We left his children, all of them, behind. We left them too easily, convincing ourselves they would be just fine without him there every day. Telling ourselves it was better they spend “quality time” with him in a peaceful environment than to be with him daily in the midst of a stressful marriage. How stupidly careless we were with all of their lives!

We left my oldest with a divided family, having to adjust to stepparents, then to go through difficult days without her mom present because of the chaos going on when my youngest disclosed the abuse – the secret she had kept for too many years. We left my youngest angry at God and hating herself, self-destructive in a horribly disfiguring way, with no sense of how valuable she was.

Jerusalem has sinned greatly and so has become unclean. All who honored her despise her, for they have all seen her naked; she herself groans and turns away. Her filthiness clung to her skirts; she did not consider her future. Her fall was astounding; there was none to comfort her. “Look, Lord, on my affliction, for the enemy has triumphed.” Lamentations 1:8-9 (NIV)

Read Part 2 of my story on Wednesday……